Uninvited Guests Hear a Confession

Mr. Tiddles and Goatboy's slut truck runs out of petrol.  They happen upon a small cabin.

They knock three times and someone answers the door...

The mysterious lady in the cabin speaks...

"Who the hell is knocking at my door at this time of night?  I get up to answer the door.  I open the door slowly.  Get a load of these two freaks.  They storm my lovely abode as if they are storming a castle.  The person in a goat mask grabs me and throws me to the ground.  The person in a disturbing pointy nose mask shouts orders to the goat.   He turns around and double locks my cabin door.  I am propped up in a chair.  The goat pulls out a long piece of rope from inside his jacket and ties me up as ordered.  He roughly stuffs a rag in my mouth so I cannot scream.  It does not matter, my cabin is so far away from civilization, no one would hear my cries anyway!  I look at these two beings with a frightened look on my face.  The guy in the pointy nose mask is babbling that I deserve my fate and he and his apprentice are there to help me to make my transition to the great beyond.  He calls himself         Mr. Tiddles.  I think he is just deranged!!! "

"I am sitting here thinking maybe this freak is right, I deserve this fate, and whatever he and his goat friend are going to do to me.  Yes, I have been despicable and caused many people a great deal of misery in my lifetime.  Maybe I should confess my transgressions to these guys.  Will this give me a free pass and allow me to escape?  I have to try it.  I attempt to speak through the gag.  They are both not listening to me.  They are rummaging through my cabinets looking at their contents.  I have no idea what they are looking for or if they even, know.  They find my industrial-size box of sanitary napkins.  They seem to be going apeshit over finding them.  I wonder if they know what they are actually used for."

"I am having trouble breathing and I am turning red.  The goat jumps up and loosens my gag.  I whisper to him.  Why are you guys doing this?  He does not answer.  He sits on the floor and begins counting the sanitary napkins.  The other crazed guy tells him to keep on counting as he continues to rave about how they are ushering The End of Mankind."

"The goat stops counting and holds up his finger and makes number gestures in the air.  It seems he has counted over one hundred napkins.  The goat never speaks and this scares me even more.  How I am going to have them identify with me, if one never speaks and the other guy makes no sense at all and believes he and his partner are helping me?"

"I am going to keep on speaking and confess everything to them.  I have nothing to lose.  Maybe they will listen to my story and set me free."

"Since I was a little girl I have hurt males.  It all started with this boy picking on me in class.  I made him think I liked him and he followed me home to my family's farm.  He followed me into the shed with a promise of seeing me naked.  I took off all my clothes and he was mesmerized.  I was definitely mature for my age and had a great set of breasts.  He asked me if he could touch them.  I seductively told him to get naked and I would think about it.  All of the sudden he became shy and turned his back to me and got undressed.  I grabbed a gardening sickle.  He turned around and he was naked holding his wiener in his hand.  With one or two strikes with the sharp sickle, I lopped off his prize possession and blood was squirting everywhere.  He had no chance to scream and I jumped on top of him and began choking him.  He died in my arms.  At that moment, I thought...At least he would not be able to show his wiener to anyone else in my school.  I dragged his body to my father's pigpen and watched with glee as the family pigs ate him.  They even ate his little wiener."  

"I have sacrificed at least a dozen boys during my grade school years!!!  This bloodlust has continued into my adulthood.  That is the main reason I have never left my family's farm and live alone in a small cabin on their property.  All my family members are either dead or long gone."  

"Do you guys want to hear more?  I have other tales...to spill.  Goat and his boss are sitting on the floor folding the sanitary napkins neatly into piles.  I wonder what they have planned for me.  I hope they are listening to my confession..."